The last few weeks I have been overcome with REGRET. This feeling has brought me to tears many times because I can't help but think of how selfish I was to give up on so many great things that were going for me. In turn, this led to me seemingly giving up on my family, my team of coaches that were looking to me as their leader, and countless other followers that I had gained the trust of.
Having lost over 70 pounds was no easy task. It was difficult to work every day to improve myself and to gain self control and self discipline. But the rewards were WORTH it all! I felt FREAKIN' AMAZING! My energy and drive was through the roof, and I was on track for greatness!!!! I seriously can't help but smile when I think of the way I felt and the excitement that surrounded my thoughts and actions! All that hard work was paying off and I was even matching my husband's full time income just by helping others become better!
But you know, come to think of it, gaining back 50 pounds was really no easy task either. I mean it was easy because I didn't have to do ANYTHING. I could eat what I want, when I wanted, and not have to exercise. EVER. I could spend my time doing whatever I wanted and not have to measure up to anyone else. But mentally, it was an even MORE DIFFICULT struggle. It was indescribably difficult. I had to literally spend hours hours a week convincing myself that I wasn't meant for greatness. It took much time and effort to focus on why I DIDN'T NEED to do it, instead of spending half as much time focusing on why I actually could. It was so difficult to look in the mirror and tell myself that it was okay to not "look great". After all, life isn't about "looking great" is it? But what about "FEELING GREAT"? Doesn't that matter? I tell you what, over a period of several months and not a day went by that I didn't think about Beachbody. The disappointment was overwhelming then, and the regret NOW is even greater!
I was going to quit Beachbody coaching, but God had other plans. Unexpectedly, my heart was opened back up the the possibilities and dreams I once had. I was overwhelmed with excitement and passion that I hadn't felt in so long. I was reminded of the LOVE I had for improving myself and helping others along the way. I remembered how I was becoming a better person and I was SEEING my dreams come true!!! I let it slip away, but thankfully it isn't too late to get back on track. It's not about the money, but about FREEDOM!!!!
Although REGRET has surely made its way into my heart and mind, I am thankful that I have had this experience. I now KNOW without a shadow of doubt, that THIS is part of my journey! I HAVE to go through this so that I can help others through it later on. This heartbreaking experience is only making me stronger. And so for that, I am thankful. I have to move past this regret and begin my journey back to feeling EMPOWERED, ENTHUSIASTIC, and DRIVEN. It has been revealed that we are ALL meant to do great things in this life! By being an example to others and serving them, I AM FULFILLING A GREATER PURPOSE IN LIFE! I am a CONQUEROR and a LEADER and I CAN and WILL make a difference! Not only in my life, but in the lives of thousands of others! Cheers to FAILING FORWARD!
(If on a mobile device) CLICK HERE to see a video from me this morning!
I am working this week to overcome this regret that has seemed to swallow me up. Instead of focusing on the past, I am putting this out there to RELEASE it and so I can move on to BIGGER DREAMS and helping others! Thanks for following me on this journey!
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